"The Blessings of Struggle"
"Just when the caterpillar thought her life was over, she began to fly."
Zhuangzi, Chuang Tzu
Today I would like to share with you a thought provoking story about misguided kindness. It’s one of the reasons why so many of us are keeping themselves small by holding back or clinging to the status quo.
A woman found a cocoon of a butterfly. The next day a small opening appeared.
She watched the butterfly for several hours as it struggled to force its body through the little hole. Until it suddenly stopped making any progress, and looked like it was stuck. So the woman decided to help the butterfly. She took scissors and snipped off the remaining bit of the cocoon. The butterfly then emerged easily, although it had a swollen body and small, shriveled wings.
The woman didn’t think anything of it, and sat there waiting for the wings to move and support the butterfly. But that didn’t happen. The butterfly spent the rest of its life unable to fly. Just crawling around with tiny wings and a swollen body.
Despite the kind heart of the woman, she didn’t understand that the restricting cocoon and the struggle needed by the butterfly to get itself through the small opening where a way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings to prepare itself for flying once it was out of the cocoon.
Source https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VVckUjjFYlM
I myself have been raised by a version of the woman in the story. Growing up I developed an incessant need for safety since I believed myself weak and fragile. As a consequence my state of mind was so anxiety driven that I was unable to recognize and fully express my potential in my personal as well as professional life. The butterfly-story’s moral shows us that there is beauty in struggle and that it promotes growth if we’re willing to take on the challenge. As a parent I refrain from ‘helicopter parenting’ for this exact reason. It’s not always easy when as adults we have the foresight of the consequences our children will have to endure by making mistakes. But trusting in the belief that they are beautiful resilient creatures who will emerge stronger from a struggle gives us the confidence to let go. Today I feel thankful for the hardships I consequently had to go through. I’ve learned to my surprise that I’m capable of withstanding controversy. I’m pretty sturdy. Fear was the only force strong enough to cause damage and ironically it’s the one thing we think will keep us safe. Although fear is our trusted companion and protector our rational minds need to fine tune themselves carefully to prevent the worry from going overboard.
“Hardship conditions our wings and readies them for flight.” Have a lovely day and welcome struggle into your life as a learning opportunity.
